Saturday Night Fever

February 16th, 2002

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, whores and vandals, priests and saints to the weekend edition of Hänni House. I’m glad you’re here.

Let me tell you about my morning. It all began at 7 am with my alarm clock’s cathedral chimes blaring in my face. I don’t get up at 7 am, ever. Why was I awake? Well, because it’s “Super Saturday”, the annual RA interview day.

Naming the event “Super Saturday” is RDP’s attempt at tricking staff into believing that being at work by 8 am is fun and exciting.

Tricky Tricky.

They’re not really fooling anybody though. I mean, college is about sleeping late. There’s a reason I don’t have classes before 11 am. It’s called, a) I’m lazy, and b) I’m in college. As a red blooded member of a collegiate campus, sleep is my right - and i’m damn good at excercising my rights. This up at the butt crack of dawn thing, it’s not working for me.

I suggested to a head staff member we adopt a policy of honesty, and call it what it really is, Sucky Saturday. The boss lady sort of grumbled and told me my comment was inappropriate. So? Isn’t college a good place to debate or discuss inappropriate topics? Earlier this semester, I read a waiver on my sociology syllabus saying we wouldn’t be watching anything more offensive than “R, NC-17 and X”. Pornos in class? College is the greatest.

So it’s off to Joodaloops tonight with Smug Ellie and her Prince Wills. Ansmoo is in town, and we’re meeting him for burritos and bean dip. I hope Gilberto is our waiter. One night, when it was slow, Gilberto did a little Mexican dance for us, while we waited for our food. He also likes to sing when he brings drinks. There is another waiter dude there, and I am afraid of him. He is v. stern, and doesn’t like refill my 7-ups. I hope we don’t get Angry Waiter.

Readers task: Go find some fun. It’s Saturday night!

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