Sunday was a day of drudgery. Between speech writing and outlining I had a full day of menial tasking that was less than desirable for my lazy, apathetic, graduating senior - self. I did take one break Sunday. I headed to the Bridal showcase and workshop being held on campus, just feet from my room. (prime location, because, as previously mentioned, I am lazy).
Don’t get me wrong. Don’t think I was there to gush and postulate over my upcoming nuptuals. Don’t think I was there to discuss green mums, veil lenghts, or mary kay facials. Don’t think I went there to purchase a photo package or book a stay at the ramblin road inn. I was not looking for a wedding planner, caterer, videographer, or hair stylist.
Believe me. This is very important. I am *not* thinking about weddings until I get a job, a place to live, and silverware that you don’t throw away at the end of a meal.
I went for the break. I went cause I was curious. I went cause I’m an idiot about all things wedding. As I am the MOH (maid of honor) for my bestest friend Nolie, I figured I had better get some edumacashun on the subject of wedding junx.
If you go to these things, be prepared to get asked this question a lot: “so when are you getting married?” And there is no variety, no variation. Every vendor will do it the same way. First they will make small talk. Then they will halt abruptly, look you square in the eye and give you the mushiest smile ever and say, “So, when are you getting married?”
It doesn’t matter if they want to sell you hor d’oeuvers or houses, they will all give you that pathetic smile and bam, it’s “so when are you getting married?”
The *only* acception to this was the DJ. He definetly didn’t ask any questions whatsoever. DJ dude and his lady assistant just sat around and played some music. When asked if the DJ and assistant were married, they said “no, but we’ve been together forever.”
Ha. These people play weddings for a living and they haven’t even gotten around to getting hitched!
The people who work these shows are all wacky anyway. The women who run a rental store brought a fountain that bubbled milk chocolate. “Only $250!” they said.
The wedding planner/videographer ranted for ten minutes about the pros and cons of having a runner. (I have no idea what that is.) The lady had hair like Anna Nicole Smith.
The resort lady tried to sell me a honeymoon package with all inclusive golf.
The look of horror on my face could’ve stopped clocks.
No way am I going anywhere with Angelface that has all inclusive golf, *especially* not my honeymoon. I want to actually *see* Angel on our honeymoon.
The show was fun, but I tell you what, it’ll be a long time before I go back to that looney bin again!