I am a person who is always losing things. A necklace here, some car keys there, my grip, my sanity, my marbles, my way … and, as of April 12th, my job.

Yep, I am now one in a multi-million unemployed, seeking work in a rotten economy.

And to answer the question everyone’s been asking: no, I did not see it coming.

I did not expect that I would be laid off that Monday morning when I traipsed into the office as usual, high heels clacking, black cardigan whipped over a smart, vintage-style pink cotton top. I did not expect—as I sat at my desk and booted up my IBM laptop—that when I saw my coworker, Cecil lumbering down the hall cradling a cardboard box, a mixture of shock and sorrow playing out on his features, I would be next. I did not foresee the white hot tears, the trembling hands, the wash of embarrassment that enveloped me when my forlorn boss, eyes glued to the carpet, pushed a manila packet of severance papers into my sweaty palms. I did not know—could not have known—that when I left the office that morning, shamefaced and sad, there would be a huge car accident just two streets from the office, blocking my route home; the blistering sirens and staccato flicker of red and white lights echoing the panic that I wore heavy on my chest like a dentist’s x-ray bib.

The rest of the day was an emotional goulash. Shame, shock and sorrow mingled with relief, hope, and curiosity. Numbness and fear made their introductions around 5PM and by 10PM I was feeling slightly neurotic and entirely exhausted. Before I went to sleep, Andrew gathered me up into his great big arms and told me everything was going to be fine. That night I slept fitfully, entirely spent.

To answer another popular question: yes, I am OK.

Because I had the time (and frequent flyer miles), I took a quick trip to Alaska just days after the layoff. I didn’t tell my parents I was coming, I simply showed up on their doorstep, a springtime sluice of melting snow and globby mud caked on my feet. The look of surprise and excitement on Mom and Dad’s faces softened my job-loss sting and made my heart soar like the regal snowcapped peaks that press against my mother’s kitchen window.

I relished the time spent with family—I’ve had seven new members added the last three years and all of them live away from me on the west coast. An afternoon spent cuddling a trio of my insanely adorable flaxen-haired, cherub-cheeked nieces inspired me to tweet this:

Indeed, I am taking the good with the bad these days. What will I do next? I’m looking to network with recruiters and land contract work. In the interim, I’m going to use my time to read books (I’ve already finished 4 novels!), workout daily (can you feel the burn?) and improve my education—What Not To Wear reruns on TLC at 11AM M-F and so far I’ve learned (amongst many things) it’s a horrible idea to do home highlights with an aerosol spray can, and also to wear lingerie in public. Who knew? Not this working girl.