Archive for the 'Food' Category

Nutrition Nazi in the Dog Eat Donut Workplace

Tuesday, October 18th, 2005

One thing about working where I do is, any time management decides they want to spoil us working-class grunts, they do it with food. Usually the food is tied to a celebration. It’s like “Oh! It’s so-and-so’s birthday – let’s have cake!”, or “Ms. Whats-Her-Name graduated night school. To celebrate, let’s all shove a bagel [...]

Now With Increased Hipness

Tuesday, August 23rd, 2005

We took a brief respite from our breakneck programming, testing, selling, supporting and writing to party doon at A Very Hip Software Company yesterday. It was an amazing day, but now I’m sad because I think I’ve peaked. I’m pretty suspicious that I just had the Best. Work Day. Ever. And I fear that like [...]

Key West Chronicles

Tuesday, August 16th, 2005

As a nice first anniversary surprise, Angelface got us a flight to the Keys and a room at the Doubletree. Consistent with most of our adventures, it was pretty fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants. I got Key West gorgeous (in a flesh-bearing, flower print halter) and had my bags packed within two hours. I wasn’t sure if I’d love [...]

3/4 To Cuckoo and Steadily Increasing

Thursday, August 4th, 2005

The Secret is starting to wear on me, and if it doesn’t get revealed soon, it just might ruin my life.
As the countdown to Secret Reveal 2005 draws ever closer, I find myself getting more and more manic. This is dangerous territory my friends, b/c, as anyone who knows me can attest, even without this [...]

Deez Nutz

Tuesday, July 26th, 2005

My coworker, Manuel, is trying to get healthy, and as such has made the excellent decision to go on a fruit and veggie fast. Having done this type of thing before, I know it’s not easy, so I wasn’t surprised to hear him exclaim “Goddamn donuts!” from the Very Hip Software Company kitchen.
Things can get [...]

Accidental En Flambé

Monday, July 4th, 2005

Happy Independence Day America. For your triumph over the tyranny and bullcrap imposed by the British and their snooty, “proper English” accents, I salute you. I’ve been so excited about Fourth of July festivities that I ended up celebrating a little early. Last night there was a nice, big bbq - in [...]

Clean Up, Aisle 4

Thursday, June 30th, 2005

After work I stopped in at the ‘Gay - that’s my special name for the cheerful, cherry red shopping mecca known as Super Target. At the checkout stand, as usual, the poor little price check girl was completely flustered as she failed to correctly ID my bokchoy, turnips and watercress.
Today I watched, unabashed in my [...]

McRib: A Grand Sandwich for Grandiose Women

Thursday, March 10th, 2005

I read today that McDonalds is considering outsourcing it’s drive-thru orders That is just too crazy. What are they trying to do? Hire robots to run the fryers? What if they outsource to an Indian call center? Instead of fries, will they say “would you like a squishee with that?”
What the [...]

Ehhhh. Yeh.

Saturday, February 12th, 2005

I knew yesterday was going to be another lose-your-mind Friday when Nice Guy came meandering past my desk with eyes clamped tight to the steely carpeting, as if it’s cheap, course fibers were imparting great words of wisdom about the meaning of life, the mysteries of Mozart, and the mind-boggler that is Ashlee Simpson’s ability [...]

Beef Bourginon or The Wino-Smelling Apartment

Wednesday, January 26th, 2005

I am a health nut. I do yoga every morning, drink Evian water almost exclusively, and eat only those foods that are most beneficial to me, according to my blood type. I eat very little grain, dairy or sugar because they make me achy. My lifestyle is unorthodox and so are my [...]