Twit Happens Y’all!
August 17th, 2006CNN reports today that Britney Spears’ second child was not planned.
Of the pregnancy, Brit sez, “It just kinda happened.”
Now I’m no expert, but I don’t think pregnancy “just kinda happens.”
… Unless of course your name is Mary, Holy Mother of God and you are prone to such things as immaculate conception.
Now if you’re name is Mary, Holy Mother of God and you are *not* prone to immaculate conception, then you’re parents are just cruel assholes.
…
But anyway, Brit needs to wise up! “Shit” may happen and “it” may happen, but babies don’t just materialize from thin air.
They materialize from that little bag the stork carries around … duh!
But seriously, I’m proposing a ban for all child-fearing couples of the haus.
I urge you, dear childless hannihaus readers, just say no …
to cheese puffs.
If Britney’s two pregnancies in a two-year period have taught us anything, it’s that cheetos are a potent aphrodisiac.
But I digress.
mad props to girlieerin for e-mailing this article
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Hanni at Hannihaus dot com
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August 17th, 2006
I guess that 24 hour wedding she had a couple of years ago just kinda happened too. Brittni has a lot of things going for her. Too bad maturity isn’t one of them.
August 17th, 2006
You forgot the really good part about eating enormous melted chocolate bars in the middle of the night.
I’m sure K-Fed told her they don’t have any calories.
August 17th, 2006
gary–tru dat brohammie.
Erin–K-fed is retarded. And not in the good way.
August 17th, 2006
Do Cheeto’s also cause one not to bathe? It seems as though Brit’s general hygiene has hit rock bottom since KFed came into the picture. Everytime I see a picture of her I just want to wash her hair. Is that “country” too?
August 18th, 2006
you mean britney’s NOT the mother of god? i’ve been wasting my life following that belief for years now, what will i do?
August 18th, 2006
I wonder which one wakes up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat saying “what in hell am I doing with this idiot?” KFed or Brit?
August 18th, 2006
wordgirl: Ha ha ha. great comment. Actually i don’t think either of them is that smart.
I didn’t come here to comment though, i came to curse Hanni because after the post about Crocs i went on line to buy some and it’s all her fault. I have huge feet, so there’s no way they will look good, but they’ll be so comfortable that i won’t care. Curse you!
August 18th, 2006
I’m not gonna lie. When I am preggo, I fully intend! to melt chocolate bars in the microwave. That is pure genuis!
; )
I bet that’s what Kfed is using that unlimited credit card for: buying Brit all the chocolate in Switzerland.
Or you know, weed.
August 18th, 2006
marnie–on the topic of hygene, check out the pre-kevin, post-kevin pics
mmat–breath a sigh of relief!
wordgirl–neither. they’re both retarded.
menoblog–curse me?! Ha ha. You’re gonna be kissing the proverbial ground my crocs walk on once you get yours. Did you order the pink?
Keri anne-Or is he purchasing weed and then chocolate for afterwards … you know, to take care of the munchies?
August 18th, 2006
Great post, Hanni, the MMOG line is an instant classic!
August 20th, 2006
Nope, they are not pink, at my size that would have looked like i was wearing yearling pigs on my feet. They are a tasteful, slimming black. At least i am hoping that will be the case.
August 21st, 2006
great… now I want cheetos.
wait.. I digress.
I’m pretty bummed that brit-brit admitted that this was an unplanned. here I thought she and I were like.. really TOGETHER on this pregnancy thing.
oh well.. at least I can look forward to making stupid-I-have-two-kids-child rearing mistakes with her… cause you KNOW I’m bound to accidently let my 2 yr old drive my car while I nurse the younger one while sipping on a jack-n-ginger. I mean.. what are five-minute trips to 7-11 for, anyway, right????
August 21st, 2006
She`s looking so terrible. Seems to get worse and worse. It`s rather sad really.
I`m still convinced she`s in a real BAD relationship and it`s showing.
tea
xo
August 21st, 2006
Paddymick–You like that one? I had fun writing it (and imagining the reactions of incessed Sunday School teachers who disagree with my placing “Mary, Mother of God” and “asshole” in the same sentence).
menoblog–Lol @ the yearling pig. Just call me Pig Foot.
Cze-Johnson Carrie–uhm five-minute trips to the 7-11 are usually for gas, but I digress.
tea–Yeah, she’s in sad shape.