Oh Mother, What a Day
May 14th, 2006I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I love Mom.
I just can’t say enough about the woman who bathed me, clothed me, and—advancing my lifetime fascination with flatulence—taught me to sing about beans, beans the musical fruit.
Yes, while other moms were singing oh-so-sweet lullabies to their four-year-olds, mine was trilling about tooting …
And that is so totally awesome.
But I digress.
So yeah, there’s a lot of things I need to thank Maaa for. For one, she passed me bald, breach, backwards and upside down through her petite little hoo hoo. Oh yeah, and she did this at home, without an epidural.
You think I’m a hardcore hippy? Meet my maaa.
Another cool thing Mom did was make me a daughter. I mean, that right there is entirely awesome. Because—while I am innately a jackass—I couldn’t be an offspring without Maaa making it so.
Unfortunately, while Mom made me a daughter, I didn’t make her a mother (at least not the first time). That honor falls on Maaa’s first born, my elder bro-bro, Nicky.
…
But actually, (and this just occurred to me), Nicky may *not* be the responsible party after all.
More than likely what made my maaa a mother was a six pack of Schlitz and some Ravi Shankar.
But anyway …
Happy Mother’s Day Maaa.
My gift is this blog, and this post’s for you …
xoxoH
—–
I’d also like to wish a Happy Mother’s Day to Angel’s mommy Kim, my step-mom MistressElida, my sister Spanky and all the other Mommies of the haus. You are amazing.
Hanni at Hannihaus dot com
hanniluvsu
hannibehr
May 14th, 2006
Happy Cat Mom Day to you, Hanni! Hope Bella & Sphynx made you a nice, organic breakfast in bed.
May 14th, 2006
Awww thanks Dog Mom. And Happy Cat and Dog Mom Day to you! Well it wasn’t organic breakfast in bed, but Bella and Spynx did make something stinky in their box this morning. I guess it’s the thought that counts. *shrugs*
May 14th, 2006
my mom taught me the tooting song, too. i like to believe it’s motherly endeavors of this type that have made me the (only slightly dirty) quasi-hippy, northwest girl i am today. and my mom is so proud.
May 14th, 2006
Hurrah! for (quasi, hardcore or otherwise) hippies! And for moms! And for moms who teach the toot song (yes, mine, too!)! And for exclamation! points!
May 15th, 2006
you can never go wrong with “the more you eat the more you toot.” i’ll have my girls singing it in no time. LOL
i’ll see if paige will do it by the time you come home hans. not much hope for lilly though, a bit on the wee side.
May 15th, 2006
wtf? well you learn something new everyday! our mothers day is in march!!!!!
May 15th, 2006
“Oh yeah, and she did this at home, without an epidural.”
I bet you came out bright-eyed and bushy-tailed instead of drugged up from leftover epidural. That is love
May 15th, 2006
Things make so much more sense now
Happy Mother’s day to all the mommies. Other countries have mother’s day on different days. When I lived in Syria, we celebrated it on March 21.
May 16th, 2006
Thanks for the excellent “Muthers” Blog. This years celebration was vastly different than those in the past. I, my sis, cousins, my 73 year old mom, and 75 year old Auntie went to Northern Quest. Yes thats right, we & the gray hairs took on the local casino & gambled heartily. Nothing quite like the ambiance of second hand smoke, clanging gaming machines, fairly free flowing booze & colorful language to brighten your experience. So.. nothing says Happy Mothers Day quite like Vegas In Spokane. We won’t mention losses, but suffice it to say Grandma was not a happy camper.