Let’s pretend it’s Monday, so I can play mrtl’s game. Her theme this week is “won”, so today I’d like to talk about how I’m a weiner winner in life.
An extreme overachiever, you might expect to hear about my various scholastic achievements – how I kicked ass in elementary school elocution contests, how I’ve [...]

Someone told me that Ralphie’s friend, Flick (aka Scotty Schwartz), from the classic 1983 film and TBS Superstation 24-7 holiday staple, A Christmas Story, was now making movies for the adult entertainment industry.
This is sad, but predictable, as there aren’t many venues for washed up child stars these days. Porn is one [...]

“No farting in the Jeep” Angel says as he wrinkles his nose in disgust and rolls down the windows.
“I’m sorry but we’ve just eaten at Diarrhea Golden Corral and I can’t help it,” I say, (knowing full well I can, but find my anal acoustics more amusing.)
He says, (with deeply furrowed brow), “Seriously, don’t [...]

If you met me today, you’d probably think “Wow, she’s fun and remarkably well adjusted”, but the truth is I spent many of my teen years in a panic. I was worried because I was *gasp* a virgin (hi maaa), at a time when lots of my peers weren’t.
Now, every time I hear a [...]

Some have their smoke breaks, while others rely on Wheel of Death,(also known as the vending machine), to provide some sweet solace from the stresses of work. I personally like to put on concerts for my cubicle mates, wherein I crank up my iPod real loud and then sing along with Bright Eyes, Fall [...]

Well it’s official, Rockstar Brother has quit the band. After four years of living and breathing North Coast Punk Rawk, NothingLess and Rockstar Brother have agreed to end it amicably.
Rockstar Brother writes:
Dear NothingLess,
It wasn’t you. It was me. I think we need some time apart… I need to clear my psyche (and [...]