Imagine my surprise - nay - delight when, walking out of my apartment, I noticed her door was swung wide open. I realized, as I stood gawking, that in all my months of inventorying the junk she’d leave on the stoop, I’d never really gotten to see the inside of White Trash Woman’s apartment.
I [...]

Yesterday morning felt like Christmas. As I lay in bed, lazy on my day off, I just kept thinking that if I swung wide my bedroom curtains, I’d see a frosty window pane and a fresh dusting of snow on the lawn. I imagined the smell of evergreens, and the crinkle of heavy [...]

I’ve got this little gem on my desktop.

When you were standing beside the road glaring and pointing a radar gun at me, I was pointing something at you too. It wasn’t a gun though. It was my middle finger. I was hiding it beneath the dash, because the truth is, that while I have enough balls to flip [...]

I was visiting Random and Odd this afternoon and came across something that gave me pause. On today’s blog post there was a sentence about wanting to avoid researching the symptoms of a disease, because, as the author writes, “the last time I googled something to make sure I spelled it right, I found [...]

Well today is just the best, because someone is going to see post-hardcore rockers, My Chemical Romance tonight at the House of Blues. That special someone is going to jump, and dance, and (likely) scream inappropriately. That’s because that certain someone has a big time crush on the sexy lead singer, a [...]

My darling mother, a daily visitor to the haus, says she’s bored with reading my TomKat rants, but I just can’t help myself. Love you maaa, but here goes another boring post…
After first impregnating beloved Dawson’s Creek darling and good Catholic girl, Katie Holmes, Mr. Cruise asks:

Apparently, Tom Cruise, never one to shy away [...]

That sassy beyotch, Spicy Pants! tagged my ass, so I’m it. Here’s what I’m gonna do:
The Rules:
1. Go into your archive.
2. Find your 23rd post.
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.
5. Tag five other people to do the same.
And now, [...]

You know it’s been a long week when you’re surfing some Web site, see a browser pointer, and, convinced it’s flipping you the bird, shout:
“Eff you too!”

And then you *really* get pissed when your computer just buzzes right along, acting as if the whole confrontation never happened.
And then finally, when you come to your [...]

I am f*ing FURIOUS.
So, Niccy B calls me at work (on what, I must say, is a particularly heinous day to begin with) and the first thing out of her mouth is “Guess what? Katie Holmes is pregnant!”
“WHAT THE EFF?!,” I scream into the receiver.
“Yeah,” Niccy says, “I just heard it on the radio.”
[...]