If you haven’t figured this out yet, I’m a hippy who is obsessed with my two furry children, Bella Donna Bad Girl and Stinky Sphynxy.

Because I love my babes (and have an affinity for all things organic), I spend a lot of time at the natural pet food store. You’ll remember a few weeks back, when in a moment of sheer insanity I bought my naughty kittinks – its like “kitten” with a Russian accent –fancy schmancy $7/lb cat food? Well they loved it… and then… as cats do… they shat it out.

One night, they even went so far as to, inexplicably, expel their expensive vittles with great gusto in a maelstrom of diarrhea-type activity. Yeah, that kind of got my panties in a twist. A 20 minute curse-and-mopfest is not really my idea of a good time…

But I digress.

So yeah, as predicted, the cats enjoyed their high-dollar cuisine, and then thanked me by making some nice deposits into the bank of gritty kitty… Well, that’s not entirely accurate, because my cats don’t dig their tootsies in regular, gritty cat litter. I am a New Age Mama and accordingly, my cats poo in wheat. Yes, I’m serious. No, I am not retarded.

In any event, I’ve recently come to my senses. And by “come to my senses” I mean I’m still wackier than your av-er-age bear, but I’m currently feeling just mildly eccentric, rather than full-on, buy-the-caviar-of-kibble, wildly eccentric. As such, I’ve decided to purchase more inexpensive food, because let’s face it…

Ritzy-a$$ cat food is really, at the end of the day, just a precursor to poop.
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My secret got struck by lightning! It’s coming, just needs mending.